I ended up staying up until 5 am thinking about my new goals. I really wanted to be able to wake up and tackle them head on so as to not get off on the wrong foot. You know when you want to start a diet and you keep putting it off until tomorrow??? Yeah, didn't want to go there.
So starting with Goal #1 I turned off notifications on my phone so text messages will only be received when I want to look at them. I also turned my ring volume down to about 30%. That felt good. I told my husband about this goal and he laughed. He said he pretty much always keeps his phone on silent and pretty much just uses it for games (why do we pay $60 a month for games???). Anywho, I went the whole day without putting mothering on pause to check texts and it felt good.
Goals #2 & #3 kinda go hand in hand I think. I wanted to focus my time more on my kids and less on my chores/timetable. In doing so, I was hoping to be able to let them be kids and thus not get mad at them for every little thing they do wrong or slow or dangerous. I also wanted to make a serious effort at saying "no" less. Not that I want my kids to be spoiled, because I really really don't, I just find myself saying "no" a lot these days, and I don't want to be a "no" mom.
I wanted to take the kids to a "toy yard sale" I saw advertised. It was over a mile away and the kids wanted to walk. This was baptism by fire. A long hot walk with 4 little kids... No yelling? No rushing? Enjoying the moment?
I am happy to report that I walked almost 2 miles with these kids without losing my temper or telling them to hurry up. I full on let them be kids. They ran down hill, which is a big no no because that is how knees get scraped. Lucy carried a potato bug half the time. Luca stopped and pouted about 3 times and we just patiently waited for him in a shady spot and he would eventually rejoin us without me yelling or dragging him. Link kept stealing the binky from Lily and instigating fights over the one water bottle we brought. The boys stopped to pick flowers for me and then strategically place them in strange places... It took us FOREVER to walk to the yard sale, but the kids all had fun despite it being a long walk and really hot.
SUCCESS.
If I can endure a super long walk when it's super hot with 4 little kids acting like 4 little kids without ever yelling or saying hurry up, THERE IS HOPE!
I spent the rest of the day neglecting my housekeeping duties so my kids could spend quality time with my dad and step mom and it felt really really good. My kids were so happy and they hardly fought at all which is crazy because usually they are at each others throats half the day.
Another huge step for me towards Goal #3 was missing a scheduled event. There was a farewell party scheduled for tonight that I was planning on going to. It is really really really hard for me to break away from a scheduled event. Once it is on my calendar I feel insanely obligated to go. But for once I overcame my instincts and desires and put my kids happiness first. They definitely had more fun with my dad and step mom and if I had gone to the party I would have been rushing and stressed and it probably wouldn't have been worth it in the end. I am crazy stubborn so this is a big deal. I feel good.
I'm looking forward to more fun days and happy kids. (although at some point I really do need to clean my house... it is a disaster.)
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